Dear Dish on Usurpers
Dear Dish:
I crave more adventure in my life. I live on a boring street. Consequently, I think I should move to a street with an interesting name, like Pineapple Street. Anywhere outside of Hawaii would find this unusual.
Then I could be like, "Hello, my name is Dish and I live on Pineapple Street."
What do you think?
Sincerely,
A Wanderer
P.S. Do you ever write letters to yourself and then answer them?
Dear Wanderer:
Personally, Dish has always wanted to live on Jubilee Road or Bliss Street in Halifax, just because it sounds like people who live there are destined to be happy. If you are looking for an interesting place to live in O-town, why not try Eden Avenue (bound to be paradisiacal), Paul Anka Drive, or possibly even Patricia Avenue (how could you possibly go wrong there!).
Please note that Dish has better things to do with her time than to write questions to herself and answer them. She is merely here to help those who can't help themselves - a help the helpless or hopeless type of scenario, if you will.
Most importantly, before you go all Single White Female, just remember that identity theft is a crime. Dish does not appreciate readers trying to impersonate her or usurp her life in a futile attempt to fill a void in their own lives.
So back off. I have stilettos and menions.
Dish
posted by Dish @ 8:20 PM
2 Comments:
1. Admit it. You wrote that letter!
2. You no longer have menions! Yeah, I went there.
You're a high risk individual as far as identity theft goes, Dish. But those are the risks that go along with being in the limelight.
Post a Comment
<< Home