The Biggest Disappointment of Dish's Life
Ok. Well, perhaps that is a slight exaggeration, but this incident definitely rates high on the disappointment scale. Friday, some friends (who shall remain nameless to protect the not-so-innocent) and Dish got together for white trash goodness at its best (i.e. the Rock of Love Bus finale and hot dogs).
Dish brought with her the Red Hots 2 Minute Hot Dog Cooker . Now for some reason Dish cannot explain, despite having received the Red Hots 2 Minute Hot Dog Cooker in 2007, she has never actually tried cooking a hot dog in it. Perhaps she was waiting for the perfect opportunity. And this, my friends, was it. Let's tell this story in pictures, shall we?
Cracking open the hot dogs...
These hot dogs are not standard size!
But that is easily remedied...
Dish is not sure she agrees with putting all the hot dog bits in there. There is something unappetizing about hot dog bits.
Yay! Ready to go! Two regular hot dogs, one veggie dog and a bunch of sketchy looking hot dog bits!
As per the instructions, Dish plugged in the hot dog maker and shut the lid. The indicator light was then supposed to come on to show Dish that her hot dogs were cooking and, in a mere two minutes, she should have had deliciously cooked hot dogs. But OH THE DISAPPOINTMENT! Note the lack of shiny lit up indicator light (and Dish’s expression of sadness and defeat).
The hot dogs (and bits) will have to be boiled. Now KT’s house smells like hot dog day. All that's missing is that orange drink with no fizz from MacDonald's.
The freedom fries turned out deliciously! Good work Michelle!
I was forced to eat the hot dog bits...
Someone couldn't wait to eat the bits.
There wasn't even time to pour the ketchup out of the bottle.
Kyle arrives to try to save the day by fixing the Red Hots 2 Minute Hot Dog Cooker...
But alas. He is unsuccessful. He is undeterred and eats the hot dogs raw instead. Dish does not approve.
The moral of this story? Never, never, NEVER mess with the Universe. What did Dish say? Quote: "The true temptation here is to write to Charlescraft and tell them that my beloved Red Hots machine has broken and I can't live without it and see what they can do for me. I wonder do they still have any of these things on hand?" And what happened?! You can see what happened!!
Oh. And just one more thing: Why Universe?! WHY?!
posted by Dish @ 10:00 PM
3 Comments:
McDonald's no longer sells the fizz-less orange drink! We went through the drive thru and I freaked out when the man told me I could not have orange drink with my filet-o-fish! I said, "You have broken my heart, sir. Borken. My. Heart." So when we drove up to pay, I asked him what little kids all across the land will drink on hot dog day at school and he said, (get this) "Well, we have Coke Zero now." COKE ZERO??? At hot dog day at elementary school?? Clearly, McDonald's hiring practice does not include a thorough screening for mental illness . . .
I'm quite disappointed as well as I would have returned it if I knew it wasn't working!
You should recall that Gus Johnson is an electrical engineer. Perhaps you could send the device his way and he should be able to return it in working order. I believe Dish has his address.
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