Dear Dish on Mullets
Dear Dish:
You know what? The prevalence of mullets has been increasing at an alarming rate. Some people claim this isn't true. Some people call me a liar. However, I don't think this can be ignored.
Can you please comment on this social trend? Should it be encouraged....or squashed by an authoritarian governmental authority (I'm looking to the translators on this one...)??
Sincerely,
A Mullet Observer
Dear Observer:
First let me define "mullet" for any readers who may have been living under a rock or in some other remote location for the past couple of decades.
A mullet is an unfortunate haircut from the 80s that is short in the front and long in the back (i.e. business in the front, party in the back). It was often sported by hockey players and thus often also referred to as hockey hair. Please note, as I have pointed out before, if you never played hockey, your mullet was just a mullet — not hockey hair.
On a woman, this haircut is referred to as a fullet (shortened form of female mullet).
To my utter chagrin, Wikipedia states that David Bowie may have been instrumental in popularizing the mullet. Although, given a recent Wikipedia-related disaster in the form of the movie Hatchet (ahem), who knows what to believe any more. Also, after I watched The Man Who Fell to Earth, David Bowie lost pretty much all of his credibility in my books anyway. But I digress.
The reason why you are seeing a come back in the mullet is that the 80s are making a come back. It started out slow with the revival of 80s cartoons and toys, such as Care Bears, He-Man, Strawberry Shortcake and Transformers. Then, fashion followed suit. This season, the over-sized sweaters, leggings, metallic accessories, short peter-pan-like boots and neon coloured shoes are all the rage, just like in the 80s. Really, it only stands to reason that the 80s hairstyles would also be revived.
Is this a good idea? Dish's answer on this one is a resounding no. The mullet is not a good look for anyone. Ok, so maybe Jonbon had a border-line mullet but it was really more rocker hair than mullet and besides, he's Jonbon, so he is an exception to every rule. I will also let MacGyver get away with his temporary mullet phase.
Truth is, many a rocker and civilian THOUGHT they looked ultra-cool sporting a mullet, but one only has to look as far as Kim Mitchell, Billy Ray Cyrus or Michael Bolton to realize how bad this hair era actually was. Some things are just better off left in the past where they belong. The mullet is one of them.
Given that this trend may not make enough of a revival to warrant government intervention, Dish pleads with her readers to take on a personal crusade against ugly hair.
I'm counting on you, my faithful readers.
Dish
posted by Dish @ 7:58 AM
3 Comments:
I don't know, Dish. This is exactly the same advice you said about zombies, and then look what happened...
You'll have to be a little more specific...
...you know what I'm talking about.
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