The Main Dish: September 2006

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Eric Clapton Rocks!

Just got home. Fabulous concert.

Clapton walks out onto the stage. What is he wearing? Pink shirt. All I can think of is "Mike Perry v. Clapton"! I'd love to see that battle.

Set list the same as for the other concerts, but was pretty rockin. No Bellbottom Blues, but I guess it is my own fault for not making a sign with glitter glue.

Robert Cray also rockin. Awesome live, although he could have played some of his more upbeat stuff. I was sad that he only played for 30 minutes and didn't put "Strong Persuader" in his set.

Anyway, my bed is calling, but overall, a fantabulous night.

Two thumbs up to Clapton. That's two for two. :o)

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Palmer Was Right

Friday I get a call finally getting my referral from (insert preferred cursing here) Appletree to see some some internal medicine doctor. They told me at the time that it usually takes two weeks to get an appointment. This was at the end of July.

Anyway, I figure, what have I got to lose. So, I take time off work this morning, and off I go to a clinic on Preston. Now, I was under the impression that the referral was to a doctor who worked outside the Appletree circle. Imagine my dismay when I discover that 225 Preston is yet another Appletree clinic. Sigh.

I go in. Everything seems fine. I only wait a few minutes before I am taken into the exam room. I get weighed, measured, etc. and sit down to wait for the doctor. A little while later the receptionist comes back into the room.

"The doctor just called."

I can feel the rage beginning...

"He won't be in today. He has a family emergency."

I was like is this some kind of freaking joke?!!! Everytime I make an appointment there, never mind what clinic or what doctor, they always cancel it on me!!!

So back to Ryan...Yesterday he calls me to ask if I want to go to Jennie's going away lunch. I tell him that I can't because I am already going to be late getting into work because I have to go to a doctor's appointment. His comment: "As if. You know they are just going to cancel on you."

Hmmph.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

International Talk Like a Pirate Day

Ahoy mateys! Shiver me timbers, it be September 19 already! AARR. Bein' the saucy wench that I be, I came t'save the day and give a bit o' help to all ye lubbers who never learned how t'talk like a pirate. This video be mighty edumacational.

And don't be forgettin to use yer pirate pick-up lines today. "That's a mighty fine pirate booty ye got thar." Aaar. Now get t'work or ye'll be walkin' the plank.

Thursday, September 14, 2006

Fear in an Elevator

Unlike love in an elevator, when it comes to fear in an elevator most people do not "kind of hope [they] get stuck". (And yes, this is my blog and I can do whatever I want, so I WILL put my period outside of the quotation marks in the old school fashion, thank you very much!) Ok. Sorry for that little grammar interruption.

Back to the elevator scenario...today after work as I was on my way out of the office, I hop on the elevator, much like I do every day. Today, I was in the elevator all by my lonesome, congratulating myself on actually leaving the office on time (no last minute urgent text like yesterday). 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2 KATHUMP! The elevator first feels like it is going to plummet and then jolts to a stop throwing me about a bit. The lights dim. The indicator then goes back to 3.

TOTAL PANIC! I am freaking out by myself in the elevator. In a frenzy, I just start pushing the door open button. The lights are flickering and I am afraid they are going to go out completely and leave me in the dark. The first ten (or so) times nothing happened, but then finally the doors opened. Luckily for me, I was stopped at an actual floor and not in between floors because then there would have been a for real and true hysterical meltdown.

This made me think: the elevator is a device you take for granted. I have no idea what proper "I am stuck in an elevator" etiquette is. Do you push the alarm button? If you do, where does the alarm sound? Are you supposed to pick up that emergency phone? Who answers the emergency phone? If you push the alarm and pick up the phone, are you really sending a distress signal to two different people or does it all go to the same person? Does it connect you with someone in the building or is there some man in Timbuktu at a call centre waiting for elevator emergency calls?

Now I am freaked out about the shoddy elevators in my building. I'll be in the stairwell if anyone wants to "kiss my sassafrass". (How does Steve Tyler come up with these lyrics? I love it!)

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

See Ya Later Radiator

It was brought to my attention that this weekend is the Richmond Fair. Now, normally, the lure of the midway is tempting, but not excessively so. My oldest sister always hated going to the "exhibition" with me when we were kids because I always used to feel sick if I went on too many rides. I can't tolerate things that spin too much. I'd agree to go on the Tea Cups with her only if she didn't spin it (ha ha! no wonder she didn't want me along!). Meanwhile, she had a stomach of steel and could run from "Spider" to "Gravitron" to "Tilt-a-Whirl" to "Scrambler" without any problem whatsoever.

I could and still can handle the non-spinny ones. I like a good roller coaster, for instance. And I always loved the Paratroupers and Ferris Wheel. Although, what is up with the new Ferris wheels that don't have the cars that rock back and forth? Probably too many children falling out or something. I remember one time I was on a double ferris wheel with the rocking cars wedged in between two teenage boys who thought it would be funny to make the thing rock while we were at the very top of the top wheel. EEP! As they are rocking it, I noted 2 things. 1) the whole ride was revolving on a VW tire 2) a large chunk of the ride came loose before my very eyes and fell to the ground. Basically, I had a hysterial meltdown (but quietly to myself so as not to appear uncool in front of said boys). After they let us off, they shut the ride down and it did not open again for the rest of the two weeks the midway was in town.

So, why on earth, you ask, would I want to go to the Richmond Fair, since the rides at these places always seem to be assembled by unreliable drunken carnies? Well, I'll tell you. Not only is there a midway (death-trap rides aside, the midway does have delicious candy apples and cotton candy), but there is also a DEMOLITION DERBY!

I have only ever seen demolition derbies in the movies (and in that Simpsons episode where Marge enters the demolition derby - "see ya later radiator"). I have never been to one in real life before, but I feel like it is definitely something I should get on board with. Apparently the usual weather for demolition derby night tends to be rain, but wouldn't you think that would make it better with all the mud and such?

Another even that may be of interest is the Celebrity Pig Racing (I am still questioning exactly where the celebrity bit comes in) as well as Ewe Racing. And the Ewe Racing happens in (direct quote from the web site here) the "Celebrity Pigs Ring". Too funny! The only thing that would make this better is if they had another race, "Pig vs. Ewe". Kind of like an Alien vs. Predator or Freddy vs. Jason scenario.

Let's just say, the Richmond Fair has definitely piqued my interest. Oh and that Simpsons ep. is Jaws Wired Shut. As with all Simpsons episodes, it has some funny quotes for anyone who wants to look into it more.

Monday, September 11, 2006

New, yet short-lived obsession

I recently watched the entire second season of The 4400 on dvd. I have to say, the second season did not disappoint. Some things I predicted. Some things came as a surprise, but overall this just left me wanting to know more. Really, I should know better. I should wait until the show is taken off the air and then start watching the episodes. Then I would not be left wondering. Of course that could have its down sides too. I envision myself holed up in my apartment trying to squish seven years worth of tv into a month. Anyway, this show definitely comes Dish recommended.

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

"Mammoth" Cheese

Last summer, as part of my big things quest, I went to Perth in search of the Mammoth Cheese. Well, after driving all that way, some of the locals told us that said cheese had been torn down. Rantings about said trip can be read here.

Now, anyone who knows me, knows that when I get an idea into my head, there will be no stopping me. I was not content to just sit back and believe that the mammoth cheese had met its demise. I emailed a Perth tourism place, who then forwarded my email to the Perth Chamber of Commerce. The Perth Chamber of Commerce not only emailed me info about the still existing mammoth cheese replica, but also snail mailed me a brochure. Nice!

Turns out that the replica still exists, it was just moved from its original location. The result? Attempt # 2 to visit the Mammoth Cheese.

Off I go to Perth. Do I remember to bring said brochure or any of the detailed driving directions with me? No. I do not. But do not despair. Remember, I am not one to give up easily. I am able to get directions from the friendly neighbourhood mechanic.

A big things quest is not all fun and games. There are definite ups and downs. There are fabulous big things and not so fabulous ones. We pull up to the "mammoth" cheese. Picture if you will the following setting: There the cheese sits, in the middle of an overgrown field next to the railroad tracks on the far side of town, basically in the middle of nowhere. One side of the cheese has been graffitied by skaters. Don't the youth of today have any respect? Shameful I tell you. Truly shameful. Perhaps I should devote a Saturday to going back to Perth for a Mammoth Cheese rejuvenation project. I think the town of Perth is beginning to forget where they've come from. Tsk tsk.

Now, a word about the replica itself. Basically the mammoth cheese is a cylinder of concrete that has fallen into disrepair. It actually has moss growing out of it. The only way you have of knowing that this cylinder of concrete is supposed to be a giant cheese is that it has a sign on top saying "Mammoth Cheese".

Honestly, if you are going to go through the trouble of building a replica of a giant cheese, you could maybe try a little harder. You at least paint it with some holes or something to make it look like Swiss (although I believe the actual cheese was cheddar). You could give the giant cheese a mouse for a friend.

And, please note that this "mammoth" cheese was only about 6ft tall. Does it really deserve the adjective "mammoth"? (Dictionary.com defines mammoth as "immensely large; huge; enormous." Last time I checked, 6ft does not count as immensely large. That isn't even that tall for a person by today's standards! Now, granted, maybe the size was impressive for an actual cheese back in the day, but I think even that is pushing it.

It must not have taken much to impress back in 1893. I guess in those days a 6 ft cheese was nothing to scoff at. These days? Let’s just say, "size does matter."

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